I met this chick a few years ago through a friend and we got along really well together. Looks wise, she wasn't in the same league as past girlfriends, put I thought she looked 'ok'. Well, that was until my parents and brother were like, WTF dude? and made some passing remarks about her looking like an old lady. And the more they talked about it, the more I could see they were right. Right there and then I had a huge face palm moment, and any remote romantic interest I might have had went to hell in a hand basket.
A few days later we were hanging out at her place and she made a move on me and I froze with awkwardness. I was like, holy fcuk, how do I get out of this and still be the nice guy????????????????
I didn't want to be a bastard so I tried to get into it... but it didn't work and the more I tried the worse it got. I tried playing with her boobs but they were like old saddlebags, she kissed like a fish and needed a wash and shave downstairs.
Anyway, not wanting to reject her, I figured I'd play along and then try to escape politely. But she wouldn't let up and I ended up staying the night and she spent most of it trying to get me hard and I spent most of it letting her and making excuses for being a limp MoFo. In the end I woke up in the morning, pushed my piss-fat into the small of her back and she didn't need to be told twice. About 1min later (including foreplay, of course) I rolled off and into the shower and B-lined it to work.
Many missed calls and unanswered text messages went by the wayside that day and I called the following day to say it wasn't going to work out between us. Poor girl almost hyperventilated on the other end of the phone and I spent the next 30min calming her down.
That incident taught me a lot.....