Nick stepped out for 5min and left me to man the gym on my own while he was gone. In that time a small cult of chaotic evil halfling rogues invaded, cleared out the treasure, summoned an army of dire monkeys to anal rape me, used the paralympic powerlifting bench as an altar on which to sacrifice a 16-year-old virgin and set the place on fire. They gained 800XP and three of them leveled up. Most traumatic 5min of my life!
Actually, we really do have a paralympic powerlifting bench for the short term, so that's interesting, and I did man the place for 5min while Nick was out, so that story isn't 100% BS. Only 92% BS.