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Your gf/bf's past lovvvvers

I use to care but these days it doesn't bother me. I judge people on what they do, not what they've done. Everyone has regrets some more than others as long. I would prefer someone who wakes up eveyday with the goal of being a better person then someone who has been a saint all thier life.
 
Camo T said:
Joel and FST 99 .... To me i think you guys are onto something and I also have to agree with everything you both have said.

Both me and my misses at the moment have been out and seen the world thought we were in love and felt the highs and lows. We have both been in previous relationships we thought where the ones (hell i was with my ex 6 years) and we both believe our previous experiences are what show us how different a relationship is when u actually find the one.

I'm happier now then I have been since i was 17
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Thats right mate - I also have the feeling of not wanting to be with someone who hasnt "lived" their life because I dont want to hold them back in anyway...I want some1 to experience everything they can...I reckon only then can they fully commit to a serious relationship.....or you just get those ppl that know no better and just go with it...but most of the time those ppl will at some point be it a year down the track or 10 wake up to themselves and want to do their own thing....

When I started seeing my current gf I waited a good 6 weeks - 2 months before I said yes we are bf and gf...coz I needed to make sure but most importantly I needed her to get whatever she needed to out of her system so she could commit to me...I didnt need a repeat of my last relationship...

Karak said:
As a 22 yr old, is it bad i whole heartily agree with rambo?
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Thats your choice mate...everyone is different and has different views....as I said though before you have to look at yourself and ask yourself is it a problem with her sleeping with other ppl or am I not confident enough in myself to take that she has slept with other ppl...

For guys sometimes it comes down to simply....shes slept with other ppl will I be a good as root as the other guys....confidence is key to any relationship...be it confidence that they wont cheat on you or lie to you to confidence that you will be able to please them like no1 has....
 
Joel said:
Can I ask why it matters if you are with someone that has slept with someone else???

Not a dig just wondering....
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All good,

My last mrs was a whore more or less and l didn't think it bothered me because she was 'different' now. But it still got brought up here and there and then l thouht of all the other shit she did. Granted l was 18-19 and even though im still a kid l had severe retardation at that point with insecurities etc so thats why l think it bothered me. Might be different now but im not sure yet...
 
KungFooGoo said:
All good,

My last mrs was a whore more or less and l didn't think it bothered me because she was 'different' now. But it still got brought up here and there and then l thouht of all the other shit she did. Granted l was 18-19 and even though im still a kid l had severe retardation at that point with insecurities etc so thats why l think it bothered me. Might be different now but im not sure yet...
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Yea fair enough mate....at the end of the day its how they treat you and how the relationship is that matters...
 
Totally agree. l think its easier when you mature and get older though. It doesn't become a big deal or even anything to think about anymore.
 
KungFooGoo said:
Totally agree. l think its easier when you mature and get older though. It doesn't become a big deal or even anything to think about anymore.
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Very true mate - plus you dont have all that "school-yard" style chit chat that goes on between groups when you are dating ppl...
 
I think it's fairly irrelevant how many people someone has slept with. If you ask them, chances are they won't give an honest answer anyway. And prior to that, what reason would you have to ask them... because they feel loose/tight, experienced/inexperienced. As long as you/they practice good hygiene, who cares.
 
I just know because my guy was my friend before he was my other half. The opposite is also true. Nothing about it bothers me. Sex and relationships are just human nature, nothing more.
 
Rambodian said:
I don't have that problem, been with my wife since we were quite young. But if I were single it would definitely matter to me if the girl I was interested in had slept with numerous people. Not only would I be worried about sexual disease but ultimately it would conflict with how I perceive sexual intercourse. To me it represents the closest 2 people can possibly be together, it represents a coming together of the mind body and soul and must be viewed with the up-most of responsibility (sorry, but a condom and 'the pill' don't cover that IMO). To me it represents more than the act itself, it holds a very special meaning to me and the one I am with. A woman holds the power of sexuality, by having control of this feminine power, she truly has control in all other aspects of her life. Those who seem to lack this self discipline and sleep around in the name of fun are usually perceived as the wild girls for a reason, they are for 'fun times only', not marriage and kids material as they lack the ability for self respect, and it goes that they would also lack the ability to teach self respect to there young. Obviously people change over time and as they get older most of these ladies change their tune, and take a more monogamous view to their sexual relations (some say its the biological clock that does this to woman). Problem is, they usually have a hard time finding a guy who is their age who has decided to settle down too and end up with a dud dick head. Not all, but most from what I see.

Unfortunately most don't see it my way, a fuck is just a fuck,.......but I ask most with this misconstrued opinion; If a fuck is just that, than why does it matter if someone your with sleeps with others whilst they are with you?.....I only met 1 person who does this with their partner and didn't care, they have an 'open' relationship, I call it a fucken mess and feel very sorry for their 2 kids, but that's another story LOL.

Disclaimer:
This is just my opinion, I won't respond to those with a different opinion and want to argue about it, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, especially when it comes down to sex and sexuality.

G
Click to expand...

This is not aimed at just Rambo. I'm taking his comments to
illustrate how 'narrow-minded' we really are.

The above opinion is full of double standards & biased against
the females of course.

Either way this topic goes far beyond & deeper than we can
explore on this forum.

The issue arises because "we" as the human race have been
thought that 'monogamy' is inherent to us by religion, kings,
and tribal leaders to control the 'tribe'.

When in fact we are actually the opposite. Also "We" think that
the world is black and white when in fact it's a combination of
various colors and skews.

Devante.
 
I dont like sluts, thats why the number will matter to me. STDS are far too common these days, so is unprotected sex, even for those that wear condoms they dont protect you against all stds.

I find it quite disgusting the amount of guys young girls have been with, and 18yo thats been with over 20 guys? a 25yo thats been with over 40? Sorry but no matter how you look at it I dont think that can be classed as living life, its being a whore.

Before anyone jumps in and says I have double standards, Im 27 and have been with 2 girls. I havent slept with anyone since I broke up with my last girlfriend 2.5 years ago, I was with her for 7 years. I dont hold girls to any higher standards than I hold myself to.

Im sure we all know the difference between a slut and a girl that has been with a few guys and made one or two mistakes.

I also agree with most of what Rambo said, about how it should be meaningful.
 
kal-el said:
I dont like sluts, thats why the number will matter to me. STDS are far too common these days, so is unprotected sex, even for those that wear condoms they dont protect you against all stds.

I find it quite disgusting the amount of guys young girls have been with, and 18yo thats been with over 20 guys? a 25yo thats been with over 40? Sorry but no matter how you look at it I dont think that can be classed as living life, its being a whore.

Before anyone jumps in and says I have double standards, Im 27 and have been with 2 girls. I havent slept with anyone since I broke up with my last girlfriend 2.5 years ago, I was with her for 7 years. I dont hold girls to any higher standards than I hold myself to.

Im sure we all know the difference between a slut and a girl that has been with a few guys and made one or two mistakes.

I also agree with most of what Rambo said, about how it should be meaningful.
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There is a diff between a slut/whore and a girl who has slept with a few guys....you can get a very nice girl who might of made some relationship/sexual mistakes...you cant judge her on that...

You can tell if a girls a whore/slut....by the way they act, the things they do etc etc....if your dating a nice girl who treats you well, but has made some bad mistakes then dont judge her for that....if your dating a chick whos a straight up slut, cheats on you with every guy, treats you like shit, is a bitch, heard dirty stories about her etc etc then thats a diff story....

Its hard to explain what I mean...but there is a diff between a nice girl who has made some mistakes, or just likes sex and a chick who will sleep with anyone with a cock....

Judge girls for how they treat you not for how many ppl they have slept with....

Again at the end of the day if your totally confident within yourself and your sexual performance then it shouldnt matter if a girls slept with 2 guys or 20...
 
Joel said:
There is a diff between a slut/whore and a girl who has slept with a few guys....you can get a very nice girl who might of made some relationship/sexual mistakes...you cant judge her on that...

You can tell if a girls a whore/slut....by the way they act, the things they do etc etc....if your dating a nice girl who treats you well, but has made some bad mistakes then dont judge her for that....if your dating a chick whos a straight up slut, cheats on you with every guy, treats you like shit, is a bitch, heard dirty stories about her etc etc then thats a diff story....

Its hard to explain what I mean...but there is a diff between a nice girl who has made some mistakes, or just likes sex and a chick who will sleep with anyone with a cock....

Judge girls for how they treat you not for how many ppl they have slept with....

Again at the end of the day if your totally confident within yourself and your sexual performance then it shouldnt matter if a girls slept with 2 guys or 20...
Click to expand...


The first paragraph is kind of what i was saying but no matter how you look at it a mid 20yo with over 10 guys is not a couple of mistakes, thats getting into the easy category and someone thats slept with a number equal to or near their age thats just .........

I dont think a girl needs to cheat to be classed as a slut but I agree you should take into account how they treat you.

Im confident with my sexual performance but I also want to be confident its something we share with few people, not something that a bunch of other guys share as well.
 
It's hard to let it go though. Especially if they've moved on before you. Say you saw her walking down the street with some other dude when you still want her, would suck pretty hard.
 
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