TrentZor
Member
12/18/2010 10:51:07 AM - Clint Darden Are You ATE UP?
We have all taken things just a little too far at times. Wait, maybe I should say “we all know someone else that has taken things just a little too far at times” because WE are normal. We don’t do things that are over the line…we draw the line.
But here is a short list of things that you can use as a check list to see if you are ATE UP. Remember, the key to being ATE UP isn’t the DOING of these things but the doing of these things without realizing that there is anything “odd” about it. It has to have happened normally and feel completely rational both when it took place as well as after it took place.
Being ATE UP is like the top 5% of “TRAIN”.
If you have no clue what day it is but you know that yesterday was squat, lasagna, and fish day.
If you have one pair of shoes that you wear every day that are at least 6 years old yet you have spotless Chuck Taylors, Olympic Lifting shoes, and Strongman Event shoes.
If you got teary eyed after a PR.
If you got teary eyed after someone else’s PR.
If you have a secret bench press secret that involves chicken nuggets.
If you have ever taken Test Suspension before a date.
If you found a random pill on the floor of the gym, looked around quickly, grabbed it and popped it (you never know, it could be anavar or dbol).
If you foam roll in preparation for sex.
If you use any form of support gear during sex.
If you have ever worn an old pair of squat briefs under your shorts to the movie theater.
If you went to the gym on your wedding day.
If you turned down a three some because you had to deadlift the next day.
If you barely passed Chem 105 yet can get Testosterone Enanthate to hold at 400mg/ml.
If you set a new Bench Press PR in a meet 3 months after a kidney transplant.
If you can do 400 pound farmers walks for 50 feet but carrying two bags of groceries from the car to the kitchen is too much work.
If you eat before you go out to eat.
If Taco Tuesday means buying 50 tacos and freezing all that you can’t eat.
If you don’t have any children yet you buy baby wipes by the case.
If you don’t have any children yet purchase baby food (Hawaiian Delight) by the case.
If you measure the quality of your diet by the smell of your gas.
If you don’t drink yet you own 10 beer kegs.
If the part you enjoy most about Christmas is that the stores now carry Boiled Custard.
If you only have 6 every day shirts yet you have 4 bench shirts, 3 squat suits, 3 pair of briefs, and two deadlift suits.
If your last three Summer Family Vacations have been based around PR’s and contests.
If you have ever moved and the most expensive thing you had to take with you was a GHR.
If you have ever had to drive 3 hours to pick up your Super Yoke and Conan’s Wheel, drive them home, take them apart, carry them inside, watch your mother wrap them and put the pieces under the tree, and wait 3 weeks to open them so that you can train with them for your contest in February.
If you got your new bench shirt, KNEW not to put it on a lone at home, DID, then had to “drive” to the gym to find someone to take it off for you.
If you got to your strongman contest, it was delayed a few hours due to weather, decided to have sex with your wife in your hotel room, competed and had a HORRIBLE day, told a friend under the confidence that he could never tell another soul (especially his training partner, who would have KILLED him for being so stupid).
If you see 1ml empty in a 6ml syringe and it bothers you.
If you barely passed Math 110 yet you can calculate your protein, fat, and carb intake in your head from the last 3 days.
If your wife has ever slapped you before a lift.
If your wife has ever been disappointed in your performance after a meet.
If the toughest day of your week is your rest day(s).
If after having the baby, 2 days later your wife DEMANDS that you leave and go to the gym and train.
If you have ever spent rent money on protein powder.
If you read Dave Tate talk about how you should be having sex with your wife and be right at THAT point when you tell her that you just dropped $300 on a new bench press shirt…AND TRIED IT!
If you still read Dan Duchaine’s articles in your old MuscleMedia2000 magazines.
If you lose sleep at night because you can’t stop thinking about the PR deadlift attempt you have coming up.
If you leave messages on your friend’s voice mail that just simply says “Squat, 6:30, balls to the wall”.
If you ever got to the gym and sat in your car, ignoring the person knocking on your window to “talk” because you had to finish listening to “Whipping Post” before you went into the gym to squat.
If you think that watching Bodybuilding is “Gay” and “Stupid” yet you have pictures of Bill Kazmaier, Ed Coan, and Doyle Kenady hanging in your bedroom.
If you think that Powerlifting is “Gay” and “Stupid” yet you have pictures of Arnold Swarchenegger, Flex Wheeler (before his comeback), and Jay Cutler hanging in your bedroom.
If you shave your head but you have two bottles of hair spray in your gym bag.
If you know of at least 6 ways to use hair spray to increase your lifts.
If you have been too sick for sex and work but not too sick to bench press.
If you have ever seen a doctor because your resting heart rate of 135 was too aerobic to gain weight and blood pressure medicine HAD to be the answer.
If after eating the box of Twinkies, you looked down at the nutritional value label to make sure that you got the required amount of carbs in that you needed for that meal.
If you have ever made a new life-long friend in a Wal-Mart parking lot because you noticed he was wearing a House Of Pain t-shirt.
If you keep a set of Strong bands next to your bed to help you get out of bed as well as to assist you to get your socks and shoes on the day after Deadlifts. (Industrial strength metal clothes pins will help with the socks)
If you have to use a scientific calculator to figure out your McDonald’s .99c menu bill yet you can look at ANY bar and say exactly what it is loaded up to within nanoseconds.
If you have ever felt you have won a conversation by beginning your reply with “Well, Dave Tate says…”
If you have ever conceded loss in an argument because your friend began their reply with "Well, Louie Simmons says..."
If anyone has ever told you that you look “gross, too big” and your reply was simply “thank you”.
If you have ever squatted by candle light and kerosene heater.
If you have a 2 car garage yet you haven’t parked your car inside in 5 years.
If you have ever stopped during sex to put on your loose knee and wrist wraps.
If you wash your squat briefs in the shower, while you are in it.
If you have never watched the video of your hamstring tear.
If you regularly mention the following things while in Church: Squat, Press, Deadlift, Stones, Dave Tate, Jim Wendler, total, intercostals, depth, extra stitch, without a heart attack, or I’ll back off right after the show...I swear.
If you stay up an extra hour at night just so you can get in an extra meal.
If you set your alarm clock for the middle of the night to down some peanut butter and a protein shake.
If you automatically convert the value of everything that you buy into pounds of ground beef or chicken.
If you have ever sat in your car and ate your pre-cooked turkey steaks and boiled vegetables while your friends were inside The Pasta House pigging out (only 2 more weeks till the show).
If “Heavy Squats” are the only thing that will get you up before 6 in the morning.
If you know of at least 12 things that will mix well with DMSO.
If you have ever been a little turned on by the smells of: Icy-Hot, Tacky, or Neoprene Knee Sleeves.
I would really like to develop this to a full quality list of 100 items that a lifter could use as a test. Something that could be scored.
40/100: Class IV
50/100: Class III
60/100: Class II
70/100: Class I
80/100: Master
90/100: Elite
So if you have any tell tell signs of what someone who is ATE UP would show...please send them to me and I will continue to publish them and develop the assessment test till we have a full 100.
We have all taken things just a little too far at times. Wait, maybe I should say “we all know someone else that has taken things just a little too far at times” because WE are normal. We don’t do things that are over the line…we draw the line.
But here is a short list of things that you can use as a check list to see if you are ATE UP. Remember, the key to being ATE UP isn’t the DOING of these things but the doing of these things without realizing that there is anything “odd” about it. It has to have happened normally and feel completely rational both when it took place as well as after it took place.
Being ATE UP is like the top 5% of “TRAIN”.
If you have no clue what day it is but you know that yesterday was squat, lasagna, and fish day.
If you have one pair of shoes that you wear every day that are at least 6 years old yet you have spotless Chuck Taylors, Olympic Lifting shoes, and Strongman Event shoes.
If you got teary eyed after a PR.
If you got teary eyed after someone else’s PR.
If you have a secret bench press secret that involves chicken nuggets.
If you have ever taken Test Suspension before a date.
If you found a random pill on the floor of the gym, looked around quickly, grabbed it and popped it (you never know, it could be anavar or dbol).
If you foam roll in preparation for sex.
If you use any form of support gear during sex.
If you have ever worn an old pair of squat briefs under your shorts to the movie theater.
If you went to the gym on your wedding day.
If you turned down a three some because you had to deadlift the next day.
If you barely passed Chem 105 yet can get Testosterone Enanthate to hold at 400mg/ml.
If you set a new Bench Press PR in a meet 3 months after a kidney transplant.
If you can do 400 pound farmers walks for 50 feet but carrying two bags of groceries from the car to the kitchen is too much work.
If you eat before you go out to eat.
If Taco Tuesday means buying 50 tacos and freezing all that you can’t eat.
If you don’t have any children yet you buy baby wipes by the case.
If you don’t have any children yet purchase baby food (Hawaiian Delight) by the case.
If you measure the quality of your diet by the smell of your gas.
If you don’t drink yet you own 10 beer kegs.
If the part you enjoy most about Christmas is that the stores now carry Boiled Custard.
If you only have 6 every day shirts yet you have 4 bench shirts, 3 squat suits, 3 pair of briefs, and two deadlift suits.
If your last three Summer Family Vacations have been based around PR’s and contests.
If you have ever moved and the most expensive thing you had to take with you was a GHR.
If you have ever had to drive 3 hours to pick up your Super Yoke and Conan’s Wheel, drive them home, take them apart, carry them inside, watch your mother wrap them and put the pieces under the tree, and wait 3 weeks to open them so that you can train with them for your contest in February.
If you got your new bench shirt, KNEW not to put it on a lone at home, DID, then had to “drive” to the gym to find someone to take it off for you.
If you got to your strongman contest, it was delayed a few hours due to weather, decided to have sex with your wife in your hotel room, competed and had a HORRIBLE day, told a friend under the confidence that he could never tell another soul (especially his training partner, who would have KILLED him for being so stupid).
If you see 1ml empty in a 6ml syringe and it bothers you.
If you barely passed Math 110 yet you can calculate your protein, fat, and carb intake in your head from the last 3 days.
If your wife has ever slapped you before a lift.
If your wife has ever been disappointed in your performance after a meet.
If the toughest day of your week is your rest day(s).
If after having the baby, 2 days later your wife DEMANDS that you leave and go to the gym and train.
If you have ever spent rent money on protein powder.
If you read Dave Tate talk about how you should be having sex with your wife and be right at THAT point when you tell her that you just dropped $300 on a new bench press shirt…AND TRIED IT!
If you still read Dan Duchaine’s articles in your old MuscleMedia2000 magazines.
If you lose sleep at night because you can’t stop thinking about the PR deadlift attempt you have coming up.
If you leave messages on your friend’s voice mail that just simply says “Squat, 6:30, balls to the wall”.
If you ever got to the gym and sat in your car, ignoring the person knocking on your window to “talk” because you had to finish listening to “Whipping Post” before you went into the gym to squat.
If you think that watching Bodybuilding is “Gay” and “Stupid” yet you have pictures of Bill Kazmaier, Ed Coan, and Doyle Kenady hanging in your bedroom.
If you think that Powerlifting is “Gay” and “Stupid” yet you have pictures of Arnold Swarchenegger, Flex Wheeler (before his comeback), and Jay Cutler hanging in your bedroom.
If you shave your head but you have two bottles of hair spray in your gym bag.
If you know of at least 6 ways to use hair spray to increase your lifts.
If you have been too sick for sex and work but not too sick to bench press.
If you have ever seen a doctor because your resting heart rate of 135 was too aerobic to gain weight and blood pressure medicine HAD to be the answer.
If after eating the box of Twinkies, you looked down at the nutritional value label to make sure that you got the required amount of carbs in that you needed for that meal.
If you have ever made a new life-long friend in a Wal-Mart parking lot because you noticed he was wearing a House Of Pain t-shirt.
If you keep a set of Strong bands next to your bed to help you get out of bed as well as to assist you to get your socks and shoes on the day after Deadlifts. (Industrial strength metal clothes pins will help with the socks)
If you have to use a scientific calculator to figure out your McDonald’s .99c menu bill yet you can look at ANY bar and say exactly what it is loaded up to within nanoseconds.
If you have ever felt you have won a conversation by beginning your reply with “Well, Dave Tate says…”
If you have ever conceded loss in an argument because your friend began their reply with "Well, Louie Simmons says..."
If anyone has ever told you that you look “gross, too big” and your reply was simply “thank you”.
If you have ever squatted by candle light and kerosene heater.
If you have a 2 car garage yet you haven’t parked your car inside in 5 years.
If you have ever stopped during sex to put on your loose knee and wrist wraps.
If you wash your squat briefs in the shower, while you are in it.
If you have never watched the video of your hamstring tear.
If you regularly mention the following things while in Church: Squat, Press, Deadlift, Stones, Dave Tate, Jim Wendler, total, intercostals, depth, extra stitch, without a heart attack, or I’ll back off right after the show...I swear.
If you stay up an extra hour at night just so you can get in an extra meal.
If you set your alarm clock for the middle of the night to down some peanut butter and a protein shake.
If you automatically convert the value of everything that you buy into pounds of ground beef or chicken.
If you have ever sat in your car and ate your pre-cooked turkey steaks and boiled vegetables while your friends were inside The Pasta House pigging out (only 2 more weeks till the show).
If “Heavy Squats” are the only thing that will get you up before 6 in the morning.
If you know of at least 12 things that will mix well with DMSO.
If you have ever been a little turned on by the smells of: Icy-Hot, Tacky, or Neoprene Knee Sleeves.
I would really like to develop this to a full quality list of 100 items that a lifter could use as a test. Something that could be scored.
40/100: Class IV
50/100: Class III
60/100: Class II
70/100: Class I
80/100: Master
90/100: Elite
So if you have any tell tell signs of what someone who is ATE UP would show...please send them to me and I will continue to publish them and develop the assessment test till we have a full 100.
