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Look at it this way...
I guarantee that me seeing myself in the mirror daily is worse than you seeing yourself.
My workaround is to not look down.. lol
I'm going to actually do what I suggested to you.
After Nationals I'm going to stop reading peoples awesome training logs seeing their gains and stop trying to keep up, and actually do a proper cut till I'm happy.
Just ask yourself how your gonna feel when your competitor takes home your trophy and records.
Then posts pictures of it all over facebook and everyone tells her how strong and fantastic she is....
Its how I look at it.