RyanF: did you ever look at 5/3/1 variants such as 8/6/3? Usually most of the criticism is aimed at Wendler's vagueness about assistance work, or that the progression is 'too slow' (i personally don't agree if you derive your TM from your true 1RM).
I found doing 5 day body part splits totally ineffective as a rank beginner; I got more strength and better looking legs from squatting 3 times a week rather than doing leg curls, squat, leg extension, leg press, seated and standing calf raises on 'leg day', which not only gave me crippling DOMS the next day, but didn't seem to really make any difference week to week.
Any ridiculous "movie star" workouts which are usually a variation on the junk in muscle mags
The routines that the "PT"s at the gym hand out, which are all on Nautilus machines followed up with db curls, db flyes and shoulder press. No barbell work at all.
Never heard of 8/6/3. I don't think that variant was in circulation back when I gave 5/3/1 a run for its money. *looks up 8/6/3* Okay, at a cursory skim, that seems to be more or less the same thing, just with slightly lower starting weights. Same method, though. The original program's designed so that realistically you could get about 10/8/4-5 on the top sets of the first cycle, so this doesn't look like a significant enough change to be particularly noteworthy. If I were to do anything like 5/3/1 again, I wouldn't worry at all about the details on the sets leading up to the top set. I'd just warm up for the top load and go for it. But I
would use those lower percentages to reverse pyramid down after the top set. So, instead of doing 65%/75%/85% in week 1, I'd do 85%/75%/65%, and I'd treat all three sets the same way Jim Wendler recommends treating the top set. Of course, that means that if I were to do 5/3/1 again, I actually wouldn't do 5/3/1. But I'm okay with that.
I don't mind the "vagueness" about assistance work in 5/3/1. After being engorged in Riptard culture where so much as a set of bicep curls (not hidden away on a Friday night when no one's in the gym to see it) will ruin everything, I appreciate that he offers various assistance templates and lets you use your brain to determine what assistance exercises you should plug into those templates. Since the average person doesn't know how to program their training, this could arguably be giving too much power to the uninitiated, but since I came to 5/3/1 with years of programming knowledge under my belt, that wasn't an issue. As I said before, I found that following the main lift templates and assistance templates given meant a lack of progress on the main stuff and all my progress was on the assistance stuff. I saw the potential for that to be the case, and running the program confirmed it.
I made no progress on the top end stuff in 5/3/1, so anecdotally I would confirm that the progression is too slow...because not improving from month to month and making no progress is definitely too slow. However, the reasons most people give for the progress being too slow are retarded. The program allows both rep and weight progression. In theory, you could do 10 reps of the top set in cycle 1, week 1, then 13 reps of the top set in cycle 2, week 1. Because of the autoregulation on reps, it's not really a hindrance that you're only adding 2.5/5kg to your training max each month. Although if you do find your reps on the top set getting higher than you feel they should be, you could always increase the monthly weight increment to keep your reps within a certain range. So, I found that the program simply didn't drive progress the way it was intended to, which is insufficient progress; the average person's criticism about progress on the program on the other hand is just a misunderstanding of how to use both weight and reps to progress.
Movie star workouts are the lol. Nuff said.
Your gym has some fascinating PT's. Every gym I've been a member of, the PT's have been too insecure to give clients machine exercises, because "If they know how to use machines, they won't need me. I need to teach them free weight exercises because they're harder to learn, and so I'll be needed for longer, and will get more pay for more work." The only trainers I've known to give out lots of machine exercises were ones who were getting paid by the hour to be there and had a half hour programming appointment with a member (not a client), and so instead of being worried about the member not coming back for another session in 2 days time, they didn't want to have to tell the member anything for another 6 weeks.