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strength and fitness for someone who isn't a narcissist or sissy little bitch

B

Brick

Well-known member
Alright c*nts I just want to be fit, but that's got me thinking what's fit right?

I'm no weak gutted pencil necked Nancy boy, if I was jammed in the remand centre tomorrow I'm not gonna be the one in the holding cell trying to hang himself with a sock noose cause he was an easy target. Having said that I'm in pretty shit shape.

i lump heavy shit, climb stairs or use machinery 10-11 hrs a day at work, I can bench 100kegs, ohp 70. I'm certainly not the most slovenly mid 30's wasp in the country but I want to be fitter without eating into my drinking and fucking time to much.

so I'm thinking the following would be a decent base to be considered fit-

able to run a 10k at a solid jog without stopping
Squat 3 plates aside
bench 2 plates aside
50 x 10kg weighted situps
10 x wide grip Chins + 20kg

i just wanna be old school fit, not disco jacked, or hipster cross fit but more fuck all the milfs in the school yard fit but still have enough time not training to rebuild the Harley, enjoy every other weekend with the kids and not spend more time in the gym then the paid pt's.

you guys reckon there's any other goals I should add and if this is attainable with 3 runs a week and 3 more training sessions?

and before anyone asks yes my diet is shit, I get nearly as many calories from booze as I do from food and I punish my very resilient body with many other illicit substances & no this won't change in the short term.
 
I reckon that's a pretty good list for test of fitness.
Other option for 10km would be a beep test maybe?
 
I will add one other goal that I've been training for the last 17 years but continues to elude me, I want to be able to bend a 3 inch nail in half with one hand. I've only ever met one other person who could do that and I will do it before I die.

Only a a stiff dicked alpha can bend a 3 in half
 
Don't change your shitty diet, boozing and drug habits then continue to look like shit.
 
Shrek said:
Don't change your shitty diet, boozing and drug habits then continue to look like shit.
Click to expand...

Um I don't actually look like shit and bet I fuck more chicks then you so your insults are rendered meaningless. Besides this isn't about looks didn't you read the thread title before engaging your tiny narcissists brain and mashing the keys on your iPhone?
 
White_Lie said:
I reckon that's a pretty good list for test of fitness.
Other option for 10km would be a beep test maybe?
Click to expand...

Not a bad idea I just think k's clocked is more challenging then racing a beep. For me anyway, everyone's different but I like the idea of chipping away at the runs till I can cover a certain distance without breaking a sweat
 
Brick said:
I'm no weak gutted pencil necked Nancy boy, if I was jammed in the remand centre tomorrow I'm not gonna be the one in the holding cell trying to hang himself with a sock noose cause he was an easy target.

i lump heavy shit, climb stairs or use machinery 10-11 hrs a day at work, I can bench 100kegs, ohp 70. I'm certainly not the most slovenly mid 30's wasp in the country

Um I don't actually look like shit and bet I fuck more chicks then you
Click to expand...

But....I thought you weren't narcissistic...?
 
@%1;
Shrek said:
Me? I'm not the one who lesds the shitty lifestyle.
I'll exit thread with with pity bestowed upon you.
Click to expand...

You aren't the brightest bloke are you shrek, you couldn't have dug a deeper hole if you hired a 30t excavator. Thankyou for illustrating my point perfectly.

gentlemen and any ladies or gents dressed as ladies what I am trying to achieve is the polar opposite of what shrek views as the embodiment of healthy.

in case your confused shrek I will paraphrase the last few posts brick has burned you, to a crisp ?
 
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