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Motivate the girl to gym

wheels

New member
I have a dilemma, the girlfriend is anti gym. She prefers her couple of walks a week. which I'm sweet with, however I think it'd be awesome if she started gym. But she has the idea if ahead lifts weights she will be a cross between Arnold/amazon with being "bulky".Has anyone had luck convincing there other half its not the case and actually a fun way to work out?

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tell her the only chance she has of looking like a bodybuilder if she starts injecting a heap of gear and after working out for 5-10 years with a very good diet and even then she likely won't look like one.
 
My girlfriend dislikes the gym because it feels like testosterone and smells a bit (women have much better senses of smell .... she prefers being outdoors.

Perhaps you could encourage her better with a crossfit style introduction? ... maybe a couple of kettlebells at home?
 
I have a dilemma, the girlfriend is anti gym. She prefers her couple of walks a week. which I'm sweet with, however I think it'd be awesome if she started gym. But she has the idea if ahead lifts weights she will be a cross between Arnold/amazon with being "bulky".Has anyone had luck convincing there other half its not the case and actually a fun way to work out?

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Good luck wheels, after 21 years of marriage my wife still has zero interest in lifting weights.
 
Good luck wheels, after 21 years of marriage my wife still has zero interest in lifting weights.

Bet she has the reverse push up down to an art, every time you try and lay on top of her the pushes you straight off.

Gentleman do not suggest to your other halves they need to "get in shape" I guarantee it ends with her
1. Not lifting weights
2. You going through an extended dry spell.
 
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Bet she has the reverse push up down to an art, every time you try and lay on top of her the pushes you straight off.

Don not for ther love of god gentleman suggest to your other halves they need to "get in shape" I guarantee it ends with her 1. Not lifting weights 2. You going through an extended dry spell.

Zing...
 
Bet she has the reverse push up down to an art, every time you try and lay on top of her the pushes you straight off.

Gentleman do not suggest to your other halves they need to "get in shape" I guarantee it ends with her
1. Not lifting weights
2. You going through an extended dry spell.

She does pilates so I guess at least she's doing something, although I'd love her to workout with weights it aint ever gonna happen.
 
Watching thread with interest. You're doing better than me at it - at least your GF is doing a few walks, beats what I've been able to get mine to do!

There's just no desire for exercise in some people.

Would love to see if I can help my GF find a fitness interest, that she'll want to do on her own motivation. Trick is how to do that.

If I could help her find something it would be great, I think, for her. Plus given I spend 4 nights a week with exercise of some sort, she'd potentially get more time with me, which is always a compliant.

But yes you can't force people, and must be careful that careful encouragement and introducing to different things isn't misconstrued as you being unhappy with the way they currently are... Lest you get the comments "don't you love me the way I am", "are you saying I'm fat" etc etc
 
stop bulking, lean out and watch her suddenly have a desire to go to gym herself

(this method is wife-tested, but results may vary)
 
M husband wants to be motivated but last time we trained together he turned into a hindrance! Didn't listen to my instructions and didnt pick up a bar unless I told him to.....

Workout alone forever Crew! Lol
 
I thought crossfit, maybe its worth a try. Considering everyone I know has the bug Haha
Aslong as I don't nag her I should be sweet.


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Bet she has the reverse push up down to an art, every time you try and lay on top of her the pushes you straight off.

Gentleman do not suggest to your other halves they need to "get in shape" I guarantee it ends with her
1. Not lifting weights
2. You going through an extended dry spell.

No reverse pushup, more a chinup... I'm not silly, I think 95% of girls don't like being told to get into shape

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Watching thread with interest. You're doing better than me at it - at least your GF is doing a few walks, beats what I've been able to get mine to do!

There's just no desire for exercise in some people.

Would love to see if I can help my GF find a fitness interest, that she'll want to do on her own motivation. Trick is how to do that.

If I could help her find something it would be great, I think, for her. Plus given I spend 4 nights a week with exercise of some sort, she'd potentially get more time with me, which is always a compliant.

But yes you can't force people, and must be careful that careful encouragement and introducing to different things isn't misconstrued as you being unhappy with the way they currently are... Lest you get the comments "don't you love me the way I am", "are you saying I'm fat" etc etc

I totally agree with this. Its more for the common interest of leading a fitness oriented life rather than thinking she is unfit etc.

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would she be interested in social sports (tennis, touch footy or pole fit) or something like that??? Then you could say you may need to do some weights as part of an all round fitness program??

Im lucky my mrs loves the gym. She also plays basketball (former WNBL now lower divisions) & now started pole-fit! ha. I tell her if i think shes put on weight, even if light-hearted. I always joke that i'd never be seen in public with a fat chic, seems to have worked, shes training most days! hahah
 
my +1 loves doing circuits (well, i say loves circuits, but what i really mean is "if she must exercise then she can tolerate circuits"). things like pump class, etc.

i did have her lifting and doing a rippetoe program for a few months last year but unfortunately work and life got in the way. I do have a video of her deadlifting 5x 60kg at 60kg BW after only a few sessions which i was pretty impressed by. definitely some potential there. she's currently pregnant so she doesn't really have the energy or the desire to lift so i'm hoping to get her back into it sometime next year once the bub has arrived and she's had some time to recover.

the biggest issue that she has is that there's no real intrinsic motivation for her to do it. i exercise to perform better on the bike, to have more functional strength and to look better. For her she doesn't compete at anything, she can get away with being a pussy because she's a girl and she looks great and stays that way by dieting effectively so there's very little motivating her. also, pump class or whatever can be made into a social routine with friends to/from work but it's expensive. hitting the garage for some heavy weights is not something she's ever going to do in isolation. not sure how to surmount these issues...
 
You can't 'motivate' anyone. That has to come from them. If you 'suggest' fitness routines, she'll likely take it as a subliminal message that you don't think she's good enough for you.

Also remember, fitness is one thing. Bodybuilding, strength training, crossfit, zumba, pilates, yoga...are all just ways to 'workout' to get you to your desired outcome. Whatever that may be.

Why don't YOU try going on her walks with her? Start by giving, rather than having any level of expectation.

Everybody trains or 'wants' to train for a different outcome. Hers may be very different to yours, therefore working out together might be rather pointless?

Once you've been on a few walks together, invite her to the gym, organise a free pass for her & get excited about showing her those 2.5kg db's that have her name on them. lol

Show her youtube vids on female training & remain excited about the walks with her in between your own training, to show her that you're focused on cardiovascular fitness as well as the creation of muscle & the building of strength.

Encourage her.
Get excited about her achievements. No matter how small.

You can't motivate her, but you can always influence people with positivity.

And remain open minded & flexible about 'workout routines' - no one way, is right. It depends entirely on your goals.

I swim/ride/walk/box/lift weights/do yoga as well as a miriad of different HIIT routines. I aim for good cardio fitness, increase lbm, get stronger, leaner & faster.

But thats me. Maybe her only aim is to sustain cardiovascular fitness? By walking for 30 minutes 3 x a week, shes doing just that.

When I was overweight, you couldn't have paid me, to join a gym or move my fat ass. I was ashamed, embarrassed & terrified. Walking is where I started & I still walk, just to walk. Its good for you :)

Its up to YOU to begin where she has started. Walk. Make it brisk, invigorating & get excited about it.

Excitement & positivity is infectious & influential.

I have every muscle bound man I know doing yoga. It was no mean feat! Influence with enthusiasm & give them opportunity to see the benefits for themselves (i.e. get her a free gym pass, you showing her a few simple bro curls or seated calf raises) encourage her, be happy that she's there. Be patient & be positive.

If its for her, she'll at least be curious to continue. If its not? She'll still walk.

No one loses :)
 
Can you stop with the epic long posts. It's a message board not a blog, no one comes here to read a novel by Bella.

Hmm stop for who? You? No.

I posted a response to the OP, who posed a question on a forum, which I am a member of & have every right to participate in.

Unless & until Admin tells me there's a cap on my posts, my keystrokes, or the amount of characters I'm allowed to use per post, then I will respond in the way & manner I choose to.

You shouldn't concern yourself with it so much Fluff. Like any other post on these boards, you choose to read it, or not to read it, the outcome is dependent on you.
 
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