pregnant ex of 6 weeks dumped me

Hi guys I've been quite for awhile due to the shit fight I have been going through. Firstly I separated from my wife of 6 years. Recovered from that then starting dating this cool NZ chick from work. Things where going along great until she became pregnant. Now the wife and I tried for years to have kids but no luck, I always pinned it down to heavy aas use when I was younger. 5 weeks into dating this other girl she says she is late and takes 2 preg tests confirming our suspicions.

went to the docs to get a check up and he said roughly 5 to 6 weeks. I was a little worried and.started asking her questions on exes etc. She swore black and blue that her last sexual partner was 6 months ago.

I consulted my mate and said go for a paternity test when the child is born. I mentioned this to get and God that was mistake number one. After that we started having these petty arguments that just kept adding up. She then made the decision to take her and her son back to her mins (she has an 8 year old boy). So I let her of course not trying to be. Prick.I then kept asking her where we stood.and she kept saying I don't know all the time. Anyway after a week of me asking that and still not getting an answer, I said well what do you want to do? She then phones me and broke up with me. A few choice words where said on both our behalves in the heat of the moment.

She is now about 7 weeks pregnant with my baby and I texted her yesterday and asked if she wanted to drop some of her stuff off at work. She then cracks it and tells me to leave her the fck alone and if I don't she will seeking legal help. All I want is to be there for the baby when its born and be a father, she hates my guts rite now and I'm afraid she is fling to have the baby and leave me out of the loop. Am I screwed? Do I have any rites at all?

I apologise in an advance for the typos I'm on my phone rite now and just let it rip

Wow what a bitch... normally I'm not very good with these things at all but my advice is to kill her...

I've had a couple of friends go through this and my actual advice... if it comes down to legal stuff and a definite break up... don't give her ANYTHING she can use against you. You're entitled to see the child, don't worry. It will involve lawyers of course. It might do to start making a record of all correspondence with her. And remember, do nothing she can use to make it out you're a psycho/unfit to see the kid.

Cheers mate, I'm keeping all the texts, because I didn't swear at her or loose it once, only when she called me to break it off. She is hiding the other child from his father to. I know his full name

Wow Skala that's terrible.
I'm no expert but unless you can prove the baby is yours you can't do anything.

Maybe DOCS (or your equivalant in QLD) can give some advice on how you can proceed.

Cheers Shrek, I spoke to a mate of mine and if she doesn't put me on the birth certificate, to acknowledge I'm the father then I have to get a court order and file for a paternity test apparently

Would you consider getting your sperm count tested to see if you can have kids? Might not be yours, Skala!

If it were me, Id shower her with something nice and tell her your sorry for asking for the test . Its because you were over excited / freaking out... Then assure her your going to stick around and when you have the baby on your ownsome. BAM... get the test done.

Do it.

The first thing a good lawyer is going to tell you is to not get lawyers involved, it'll likely escalate it and send you broke. But I'd seek legal advise without her knowing etc.

sookie said:

If it were me, Id shower her with something nice and tell her your sorry for asking for the test . Its because you were over excited / freaking out... Then assure her your going to stick around and when you have the baby on your ownsome. BAM... get the test done.

Do it.

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This is exactly the thing to do. Beg for forgiveness ride out the pregnancy then stick a swab in the kids mouth and get a test. If its yours continue to play happy houses, if it isn't tell her to eat a dick.

If you look at it from another angle; I doubt the pregnancy was planned and she is probably scared as fuck with you questioning her integrity (not a shot at you, just saying) and generally not knowing what the future now holds. I dare say she has a lot to contemplate in the comming months and I'm sure, deep down, she'd love to have someone there to support and comfort her along the way.

I know a couple of girls who are single mums and it is one fucking tough gig- hell, it's a mission even with both parents. If she means anything to you, it might be worth taking a step back from determining if the kid really is yours and let her know you're there for her. It might take a while for to trust you again but there's no harm in trying. No doubt the whole shock of her being pregnant is as much for her as it is to you, and you both have your own reasons for being so.

She's about to go for a ride on an emotional roller-coaster so you might just have to bite your tongue along the way

I do hope it works out for you.

Wow going through a bit of a mess myself, not as bad as this though. Shit I hope it works out for you mate, I don't really know what to tell you.

Is she definitely having the kid?? What's the go there?

Fluffy said:

This is exactly the thing to do. Beg for forgiveness ride out the pregnancy then stick a swab in the kids mouth and get a test. If its yours continue to play happy houses, if it isn't tell her to eat a dick.

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Already tried all that guys she is extremely hormonal rite now and suffering from depression, I can't contact her for awhile because she threatened legal action. Which is why if she doesn't come around in the end I will seek out a lawyer.

Minchia said:

Wow going through a bit of a mess myself, not as bad as this though. Shit I hope it works out for you mate, I don't really know what to tell you.

Is she definitely having the kid?? What's the go there?

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Yeah mate she is going through with it all, thinking back now she was planning this pregnancy from the start. I was silly enough to think I would be safe. I'm putting money away rite now and selling my Harley to free up cash, nothing is going to get in the road of this child knowing who their real father is.

Skalatharx said:

Already tried all that guys she is extremely hormonal rite now and suffering from depression, I can't contact her for awhile because she threatened legal action. Which is why if she doesn't come around in the end I will seek out a lawyer.

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I'd get legal advise now without initiating anything. If you can't afford one Caxton Legal Centre in Brisbane, Legal Aid etc.

Type in Family Relationships Australia into google and you will find a Gov run service helping families/people separating or working out arrangements for kids. Can also maybe use it to organise mediation with her. As some of the others have said the cheapest thing for you to do is reconcile with her.

If you cant or dont want to reconcile and if you don't believe the child is yours you will have to go to court to get them to order a DNA test. I think tests can be done prior to baby being born these days. If its yours you are going to be hit with child support.

Really appreciate the help thanks guys, child support doesn't worry me. I want to provide for my kid. I may get nasty with her and contact the father of the 8 year old child, that she had been hiding from

Skalatharx said:

Really appreciate the help thanks guys, child support doesn't worry me. I want to provide for my kid. I may get nasty with her and contact the father of the 8 year old child, that she had been hiding from

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That's a good attitude. Child support is only really a problem for those who don't want to pay.

Reminds me of this
[YOUTUBE][ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QEJcuiBVznY]fuck you hormones - YouTube[/ame][/YOUTUBE]
Best of luck with it, I would def seek legal advice, she may stick to her guns and try and shut you out, just be careful with what you text or say to her in case she does go for a restraining order, kids are worth the fight,

I cbf reading whole thread but her behaviour suggests maybe the kid isnt yours ?